Okay -- looks like I got caught by a bad batch of network scripts during a routine upgrade:
[I] sys-apps/corenetwork
Available versions: 1.5.5 1.5.6 1.5.6-r1 1.6.0 1.6.1
Installed versions: 1.6.1(10:43:07 AM 02/04/2017)
Homepage: http://www.funtoo.org/Networking
Description: Funtoo's networking scripts.
I masked 1.6.1 and downgraded (via /etc/portage/mask/misc)
[ebuild UD ] sys-apps/corenetwork-1.6.0::gentoo [1.6.1::gentoo] 0 KiB
Total: 1 package (1 downgrade), Size of downloads: 0 KiB
>>> Verifying ebuild manifests
>>> Emerging (1 of 1) sys-apps/corenetwork-1.6.0::gentoo
>>> Installing (1 of 1) sys-apps/corenetwork-1.6.0::gentoo
>>> Jobs: 1 of 1 complete Load avg: 0.41, 0.11, 0.04
>>> Auto-cleaning packages...
Then a trusty rc command, and viola! Started right up, just like a '62 Ford:
joeperry conf.d # rc
* Network interface eth1.1500 up ... [ ok ]
* Network interface eth1.2 up ... [ ok ]
joeperry conf.d # rc-status
Runlevel: default
lvm [ started ]
syslog-ng [ started ]
sshd [ started ]
iptables [ started ]
in.tftpd [ started ]
cronie [ started ]
net.eth0 [ started ]
net.eth1 [ started ]
net.eth1.1500 [ started ]
net.eth1.2 [ started ]
netmount [ started ]
postfix [ started ]
vsftpd [ started ]
local [ started ]
Dynamic Runlevel: hotplugged
Dynamic Runlevel: needed
lvmetad [ started ]
Dynamic Runlevel: manual
